Saturday, July 14, 2007

Tribute to Big 12 Fanbases, Part IX: Texas Tech



"Bud Light presents, Real Men of Genius (Real Men of Genius!)
Today we salute you, Mr. Way Too Proud of Texas Guy (Mr. Way Too Proud of Texas Guy!)
Men from lesser states may know their state's capital,
But you, you know your state's bird, tree and even reptile (Love that horny toad!)
You display your pride with your Lone Star Tattoo, Native Texan bumper sticker, and contempt for any state that doesn't start with 'Tex' and end with '-as' (That spells Texas!)
Sure there are 49 other states in the Union,
But they're smaller, wussier, and the people talk funny (Yankee wussies!)
So crack open an ice-cold Bud Light oh lover of the Lone Star State,
Because all that flag-waving must have made you mighty thirsty (Mr. Way Too Proud of Texas Guy!)"


In our quest to honor each Big 12 fanbase, today we cross into Lone Star country. A place that flies the flags of all six former sovereigns over her hallowed land (Texas gets around). The home of 22 million rather proud people.

We'll start off on the South Plains, which is actually in the north. Lubbock is home to the hallowed academic halls of Texas Tech University. Academics are so important at Tech that they teach spelling at the football games, too.



I thought third-grade spelling was a prerequisite for college.

Never having been to Lubbock I don't know personally, but I've heard they do a fine job with culinary arts as well. They're so proud of their food, in fact, that they like to share them with other fans at the football games. And by sharing, I mean flinging them very hard throughout the expanse of Jones Stadium.



Mike Leach's Air Raid attack has brought a lot of excitement to Tech on the gridiron. His quarterbacks routinely put up PS2-type numbers, and the scoreboard can barely keep up. Unfortunately, it appears the game is a little too exciting for some fans...



Apparently Tech also has a reputation for having the meanest fans in the conference. I realize there is little to do in beautiful west Texas...



...but videotaping yourselves vandalizing a visiting team's big rig doesn't seem like the brightest way to pass the time.



Alas, I can't hate Tech fans, when this is their weatherman...





***Special addition: Here is a supplement to this week's prior tribute to Oklahoma. Enjoy! (Thanks to The Wizard of Odds)

No comments: